Change Takes Time. Be Responsive

Change takes time, effort and planning.  If you want to a different result it will make sense to stop doing the same thing over and over again. We must be responsive to change and opportunities. Only then can we get a different outcome from the norm.

There is no silver bullet to overcoming barriers or challenges. But there’s always that opportunity to seek out the new, if we are feeling stuck.

Be open and receptive to opportunitiesWe are different in the way we respond or react to challenges. Find what works for you and do it as we’re all unique in our own way.

Be creative with your problems or challenges. Find a silver lining in everything that happens and be responsive and open to change.



Start Moving Now

To reach any destination, we must put one foot in frontStart With Confidence™ of the other and start moving towards the direction we want to go.

This is the simple idea behind Start With Confidence™. A step by step approach to making changes where required and necessary

As simple as it sounds, it can be challenging for some people, especially women that have experienced low self-esteem, Self doubt, and unsure how to take that first step to change.

It is normal for us to feel stuck at some point in our lives. Feeling this way will often lead to confusion, sadness, blame, and self-doubt. But we must first acknowledge our situation needs to change before we can truly make the start.

To change is to start the “long walk to freedom” (borrowing the Late Nelson Mandela’s words).

We can blame others for everything that has happened or is happening to us. This blame game takes the power away from us as we become dependent on the person, people or society to change before our situation can improve.

This is the wrong way to go about starting the process to getting the outcome you so desire.

Take back control by believing that you are responsible for your own happiness. Do what needs to be done. Find  the courage and Start With Confidence™.

Walk towards the place you need to be.

Certain things are required before you start: Be ready for change. Have self-belief, grow your confidence. Take responsibility for your actions. Be realistic and commit to change.

Start new, start thinking differently about yourself and believe that you are responsible for changing the way you feel about the situation you find yourself in. Ask friends, relatives, colleagues how they’ve done it and then Start With Confidence™.

When is a good time to start? ?

How about Now.

Confidence to change is your choice

We get caught up in things we cannot do but pay little attention to things we can actually do. Some people will tell you that they are quite happy with the way things are when the obvious is clear.  Such people sit down, fold their arms and resist change.

Change with confidence and growDenial is one reason why we feel stuck at some point in our lives. We resist change because we don’t see the point. It takes confidence to change or want to make changes. The biggest challenge for us all when it comes to change is learning new ways of doing things and starting over again.

If you want to grow in anything you do, changing the way you think and feel starts a process and the outcome will show. Some people will see change as opportunity while others will view it as unwarranted inconvenience.

We cannot continue to do the same thing repeatedly and expect a different result every time. So how can you change the way you feel about making important decisions that will transform the results you get?

  • Don’t listen to naysayers. We have a tendency to listen to what people say about things we can and cannot do when deep down we know we want change. Why is that so? It is very easy to believe things that come easy, like somebody telling you how your plans will not work out. It is a freely given advise and doesn’t cost much. Take it with a pinch of salt.
  • Know yourself. This is crucial to having confidence to take on opportunities or challenges. What will get you there is the belief in your abilities and the knowledge you have with regards to what you’re hoping to carry out. You could be confident enough to go forward but if you’re not equipped with the right skills and tools, you may set yourself up to fail. Be sure you have all it takes.
  • Be clear in your head about what you want and what it will do for you. It is like travelling to another town with a road map. Clearing your head of uncertainties should start with a simple question.  What do I want?  Yes, it’s true we don’t all know what we want (you’re not alone) but if you know what you DON’T want then at least you have eliminated some things.
  • Stay with and seek people who will help you learn and grow with confidence. It is true that we can easily be influenced by the people we interact with especially if they’re our role models and we look up to them. The down side is, if these so-called role models are having negative impact in our thinking and actions then we need to start making some changes. The impact if we continue on this path will be disastrous, so be aware when things are not working out for your good or growth.
  • Learn, learn, learn. When doubt, low self-esteem self-imposed barriers hold us you back from getting stuck in, we begin to feel stuck in a rut. We have all been there at some point in our work, career, life where it feels like we can’t keep our head above water. What you do at that point will determine the results you’ll get. You can never learn enough. Knowledge is power and the more you know, the less likely you are to feel like you’re going round and round in circle with no known destination in mind.

We can all make changes with practice and confidently transform our results. But we have to hunger for that change and seek help if need be.

My Sister’s Story. From a prolonged job search to a successful Entreprenuer

“Give a woman a fish she eats for a day, teach her to fish and she eats for a lifetime and feeds her community”

My sister lives in Lagos, Nigeria and has two children. She graduated from university with a degree in Business administration.

My Sister and children
My Sister and children

After graduation she searched for work for up to two years but was unsuccessful in her efforts. She was unhappy, confused and loosing confidence.

I invited her to visit me in New Zealand. At the time I owned a very successful hair supply business and a hair salon. employing several team members.

During her visit, we talked about her challenges and what she was going to do when she got back home. She went back after 3 months’ visit.

On a trip to Nigeria, I met up with her and we sat down to discuss what options are out there in spite of the lack of success in her job search effort. There are always options.

She noted she likes to cook and would like to start her own business. She needs help to start.”

I remember growing up and helping mum at the market. I really enjoyed that” she said.

She was exceptionally good at selling as I recalled and she used to come back home with all her wares sold regularly as was very good at building rapport with people.

I asked her what type of business she would like to start.  She said she would like to make her own snack foods, like plantain chips ( Green banana chips).

The reasons for these choice are:

  • Low cost entry to start up
  • Ability to work from home and still look after her children
  • Her love for cooking
  • Affordability for prospective customers
  • Demand for snack foods in the area where she lives
  • Opportunity to grow by supplying retail outlets.

Her motivating factors are the desire to be independent and self sufficient and provide for her immediate and extended family.

I returned back to New Zealand and helped her with the business plan.  She started out by working from home and selling from home.

Her products were not branded so no one knew who had manufactured them. I encouraged her to think about branding her products so it can be traced back to her in case people wanted to order more.  She did this and included her contact details in the packaging.

I encouraged her to seek out stockist in her area to create more awareness and increase buyers for her products. She did.


She is now supplying various retail outlets, bus deports stations, market stall holders and more. She has also moved her business out of her house and rented a new premises employing some staff.

These results have been achieved in a space of 5 years. She is happy, successful and independent woman all by exploring other options when things are not working out and changing her mindset.

People can be exceptionally good at what they do given the right support, tools and learning environment.  I am very happy for her success and continue to support her through coaching and mentoring.

My coaching practice is named after her first born child. She credits me for her success, but I believe she did it all by herself with my support and encouragement.

She was ready to embrace change, take risk and play outside her comfort zone. Change comes from within and our ability to step out and step up is what will create the outcome we seek.

Women can be exceptionally good at what they do. By supporting and encouraging more women to take on new challenges, we create a domino effect as their successes flows on to other areas of our community.

There might be someone that you know that needs support to be exceptionally good at what they do. Can you help that person start or refer them to someone who can help them?


If you have an idea or a dream, don’t kill it with fear of failing. Find the right person to help you and start with confidence

Throw yourself in and commit 100% to it. That is the only way you’ll know what the outcome will be. Need help starting? You know what to do.